This may be a feeling only bloggers will understand but when you first introduce someone to your blog or even mention it around someone new of course the first thing they want to do is google it or bring it up on their work laptop or desktop, my stomach kind of flips every time. Like I'm nervous or a bit worried about what they're going to say. To me, good I never started a blog thinking anyone would ever read it so to see my blog on a widescreen computer monitor and watch someone flick through it feels foreign to me, almost like someones picked up my personal diary and is giving a good read through. I've been blogging for five years this summer [which is another post I need to write at some point] and I alwasy thought it was a feeling that would go away over time...and it didn't. I then thought it was something that would vanish after I rebranded and got rid of the intern diaries for somethng a bit older? and bizarelly enough that hasnt happened either.
So I've come to terms with the fact that it's not anything to do with my blog or the people who read it, but more to do with me. I talk about my blog as an asset and a big part of who i am, it's daily content its learning new skills and meeting new people. If I had a little more confidence in my content and this little part of the internet i call my own then I wouldnt mind half as much as I do when people look at it.
A huge part of it is I still dont really know what my 'thing' is, I feel like these days in the blogging industry everyone has their own niche that makes them different and even though I've been blogging for years and years and I've posted hungreds of blog posts I still don't really know what my niche is. I love careers and employability style posts because that's something I was really passionate about when I first started blogging because that was the part of my life i was in, but now I'm a graduate and I have a job I love. Focusing on creating tutorial style content with the occasional diary style post is the balance I'm currently striving for.
You may have seen if you follow me on instagram that I'm moving to London in September. I've left my job up here in Birmingham, I've moved out of my flat and after 7 weeks of relaxing at home with my family, I'll be packing up again and moving to the big smoke with my boyfriend for a life in London. I've always put earning money before everything and being able to support myself is a huge achievement for me and something I'm very proud of, so I've never had more than 2 weeks without either a job or uni since I was 17, and I have to admit, leaving my job and accepting that I wouldn't be working for a summer was more than a little bit daunting but I think it's exactly what I need.
My plan for those 7 weeks is going to involve going to the gym - a lot - and completing my next module of my CIM diploma, but it's also going to involve a lot of blogging. I'm hoping to really nurture this blog into something I can be super proud of when I move to London, I'm not the most sociable blogger and I rarely go to all the events, but I'm hoping that with a little bit of love and a lot more content that I'll be able to get more involved with the London blogger 'scene'.
In terms of what to expect from the blog this summer, I'm not exactly sure, but I'm going to step up my writing and hopefully find my 'niche' and rediscover what I used to be so passionate about blogging. A lot more lifestyle 'diary' entry style posts because I find those the most fun to write, some more fashion content maybe? and of course my usual beauty content that I love so much.
This has been one hell of a rambling post so thanks for baring with me, hopefully I'll be posting again very soon